The Phenomenon of Divorce: Causes and Solutions

Nowadays, the phenomenon of divorce is spreading greatly. We have not seen this in the past few decades and before in ancient times.

This is due to several reasons, we offer the most prominent and important ones:

1. The Western cultural attack through all the written, visual and audio means; and the presence of those who promote it through attractive methods on the surface and deceiving in the interior. They falsified the facts, values and laws, which convey to us the reality of the life of the West. Even if it is in reality or what they seek from the corruption of people.
2. The emergence of a large margin for the women’s movement in cooperation with men in an unnecessary way. This will open the appetites to the erotic instinctive side, especially with their urgent needs for that.
3. The existence of a defect in understanding the correct basis for choosing the husband or wife. The reality will be shown after the first conflict between them. Then they’ll notice that their choice was wrong and the reasons for marriage were incorrect. Maybe the motive of marriage was money and beauty, and these will be gone with time.
4. When fiances are not truthful with their responsibilities and reality they will end up fighting and breaking up.
5. Ignorance of how the relationship of love, friendliness and respect develops which causes emotional drought in one or both spouses. They resort to establish suspicious relationships with others to bridge the emotional void that the wife does not get from her husband or vice versa. It is mostly an illusion and a mirage, because it is not important for a person to love but it is how to love.
6. Providing the opportunity with a large margin to use the imposed social media. In the reality it is means of social separation and familial disintegration which occupies the mind and cultivates spiritual anxiety and psychological disorder among its users. It also leads to a state of despair and depression, especially if it offends its use and the correct use of it.
7. The deteriorating economic, social and living conditions and the lack of access to work opportunities which create conflict and disagreement between the spouses. And for those who lack faith and patience, especially who aren’t satisfied with what God divided them for.

These are the most important reasons for divorce:

As for what can be envisioned as a remedy for this dangerous phenomenon, which would have been left without treatment from those concerned and those who confront social reform, whether from individuals or societies. And the most important of them being religious scholars who are in the interest of the nation and society. If it is left away many bad things will happen.

The most important methods of treatment are as follows:

1. Serious departure to the good choice of each of the spouses according to the controls and scales of the conditions required. It is important to know that a successful marriage is based on affection and compassion.
2. The establishment of a social institute concerned with establishing educational cultural courses for the foundations of a successful family for a period of about a month or more. It is desirable to be for those who will got marry and it should be supervised by specialists from religious, social, psychological, and educational scholars. This will help students to know the provisions of marriage, family, rights and duties before the actual association and move to the marital home.
3. Focusing on the fact that the spouses are lovers and not partners. Hence the lover lives with his beloved a life of sacrifice, redemption and tolerance for what comes out of her from mistakes but he only see them from the right side. Unlike the partner holds his other partner accountable for every small and large things. Then the matter between them led the wife to become like a policeman and the man becomes like an unjust judge who works in sin.
4. Each of the spouses should know each other precisely what they love and hate, in order to avoid offending and harming the other, and taking into account each other’s feelings.
5. It is necessary for both to know that “love” is not the only thing required in the marital relationship but “friendliness” is necessary too which means practical love and not verbal and formal. It is necessary to take care of each other, ask about his/her condition and help in solving his/her problems.
6. The necessity for a man to define himself as a “man” with the meaning of the word “man” based on rational jealousy, kindness, tenderness and good concern for his wife. And for a woman to know that she is a “woman” with the meaning of her strength, modesty, chastity and decency. So she does not go out of her home with the condition of donation and adornment.
7. Both partners should make a distance between them for a certain time in order to know each other correctly. It is also a good idea to go out together for a picnic in order to develop the “vitality of love” between them.

They must, if the problem arises between them and they are not able to solve it on their own, not to inform their relatives, colleagues, neighbors and friends. It they did their secret will deceived. That’s why they should resort to those who trust and has knowledge in order to solve their problems and have a happy life.

The article was written by Sheikh Al subeiti Ameli and first published in his Telegram Channel.